What the hell?
by dragonsrulllz
Summary: Yeah Yeah i know the first chapter and the tittle sucks but its a good fic...new christmissy chappie.
1. A mysterious scream

What the hell?

_disclaimer:I do not own pokemon and if I did would I be siting here at a frickin computer typing out fics? I think not._

**Ash and the gang are walking around pewter city when they hear a scream.**

**What the hell was that?said Ash**

**it kinda sounded like Misty Ash. said Brock.**


	2. evil misty

May: ash what the hell do we do?

Ash: we should help.

Max: I dunno it sounds pretty dangerous to me

Ash wasn't listening he was already running for the sound

Brock: sigh lets run after him

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Suddenly May, Max, and Brock were surrounded by this weird light and then they were gone. Ash didn't notice at all. Suddenly Ash was surrounded by this blue light.

Ash: what the hell?!!!!

Ash felt very tired but before he became unconscious he saw Misty standing right above him with this evil grin on her face.


	3. HELP

Help me decide on what to put in my next chappi

Vote on one of these

ash gets transformed while he is unconscious

ash becomes a girl

ash wakes up wearing a tutu and he can't take it off

ash gets beat upside the head by a mysterious vaporeon


	4. what the fuck

_**I know my chapters have been short so I thought I should type a REALLY long one just for you readers.**_

Ash woke up in what appeared to be a tube it was filled with some strange green liquid but he could breathe strangely.

Ash:whatthefuckisthisandwhereami? (what the fuck is this and where am I )

Voice: ah it appears that the new one is awake you developed quicker than the others

Ash: who are you and why is my voice so high?

Voice: you may call me Johnny and as for your voice I think you have the right to know. You have been physically transformed from a boy to a girl.

Ash: WHAT !!!!!! YOU FUCKEN FUCKED-UP BASTARD.

Johnny: call me names all you want you can't do a thing to get out of that tube.

Ash angrily tried to turn around but stopped when he finally saw his reflection on the inside of the tube.

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In another lab a different girl was just waking up.

Girl: where am I?

She then realized she wasn't the only one in the room there was a man there he had silver almost white hair.

Girl: who are you?

Man: you may call me Xemnas Misty Waterflower

Misty: how do you know my name?

Xemnas: I just do

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	5. ash

Misty: let me out

Misty started to bang on the tube that confined her.

Xemnes: I would stop that if I were you. You wouldn't want your boyfriend to die now would you?

Misty: what have you done to ash?

Xemnes: lets just say "ash" is now sasha.

Misty: YOU BITCH.

Xemnes: do you want Sasha to be sold to some guy who can't control his hormones?

Misty: you wouldn't dare.

Xemnes: I would.

Misty: Grrr

Xemnes: drowzee I chose you

Drowzee: drow? (huh?)

Xemnes: use hypnosis on that girl.

Drowzee: zee. (ok)

Misty :…..ash…….zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


	6. girl Mewtwo

Ash woke up shocked. He had heard a roar that sounded familiar.

Ash: huh? That it sounded like………!!!! No way it can't be. Entei he whispered.

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What Ash didn't know was that not only Entei was there but Mew, Mewtwo, Suicune, Raikou, Ho-oh, Lugia, and Rayquaza were there.

Mew: Entei shut up

Entei: sorry

Mewtwo: ………

Rayquaza: how are we going to save ………….it.

Mew: easy destroy the tube that confines them.

Raikou: wow Mew I never thought you to be the direct approach type.

Mew: shut up

Mewtwo: ……………mommy how are we going to escape they have us confined.

Mew: SHUT UP

Mewtwo: yes mommy

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dragonsrulllz: muhahahahahahahaha I made Mewtwo into a girl

darky: hey my cousin likes Mewtwo

Mewtwo: YOU MADE ME INTO A GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dragonsrulllz: starts typing like crazy

Mewtwo: all the sudden turns into a girl

Dragonsrulllz: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha now you really are a girl


	7. pain

Sorry I've been kind of busy so……….

Darky:……….so what?

Dragonsrulllz: shut up

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Ash awoke to see none other than Brock right in front of the damned tube that confined him.

Ash: What the fuck??!!

Brock: hello Ash.

Ash: you knew about this?

Brock: duh I'm the one who gave the order to do this to you..

Ash: YOU HEARTLESS DAMNED FUCKED-UP BITCH OF A BASTARD.

(I know that made no sense but neither does this fic so)

Brock: I would shut-up if I were you.

Ash: I'm not finished breathes YOU HEARTLESS DAMNED FUCKING FUCKED-UP BITCH OF A BASTARD.

Brock: is it ready yet.

Xemnes: yes.

Brock: do it.

Xemnes: yes sir.

Xemnes started pushing buttons on the computer he was at. Suddenly the liquid in the tube turned scarlet.

Ash: what the fuck are you doing .

Brock: does it hurt?


	8. sorry

Sorry I just couldn't end it like this so yeah.

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Ash woke up and right there in front of him was misty.

Ash: um hi?

Misty: is that you ash?

Ash: yeah

Misty: do you want out

Ash: no duh

Misty: ash I'm sorry

Ash: for what?

Misty: this

Misty pushed a button on a control panel that made ash fall asleep. She then called out a gyarados that broke the damned tube that confined ash and then got him the hell out of there.

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I'm gonna be on vacation soon so my sis is gonna be managing my account so please give her your full respect.

Darky: Droj her

Dragonsrulllz: hey


	9. strange liquid

Well, I am back from my vacation (it sucked I was bored out of my mind lol) and here is the next chapter of "What the hell" for translations go to  (oh and italics are thoughts)

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Ash:_ Where am I?_

Misty: you're finally awake ash

Ash: Secdo frana ys e yht frana ec begylri

Misty: My cottage and pikachu is sleeping.

Ash: Fro ys e cbaygehk mega drec?

Misty held up a container it had red liquid with a greenish tint in it.

Misty: This liquid is a rare thing to make it requires the nectar from the waterflower and a petal from the "nat tuus flower" or the "red doom flower". The liquid will save anyone from dieing of poison or of wound but, the person whom it was used upon must speak the language of the person who first made the liquid.

Ash's eyes were wide he couldn't believe what he was hearing he couldn't speak English.

Ash: Pid ev e lyh'd cbayg ahkmecr ruf femm E-

Misty: shh they are coming

Ash: hu E fuh'd crid ib.

Misty sighed she then whispered one word that made Ash sleep

Misty: sytha..


	10. huh?

For those of you who didn't go to the site that had the translations on it here are the translations

: Secdo frana ys e yht frana ec begylri: Misty where am I and where is pikachu?

Fro ys e cbaygehk mega drec?: Why am i speaking like this?

Pid ev e lyh'd cbayg ahkmecr ruf femm E-: But if i can't speak english how will I-?

hu E fuh'd crid ib: no I won't shut up

DR: now back to the fic.

Ash: ugh _why do I feel like someone hit me upside the head?_

Misty: because I had to use a word from the ancient language that not even I know all about.

Ash: um, ok-hey I'm speaking English.

Misty: no duh

Ash started to think about why he was so cold.

Ash: brrrrr.

Misty: you cold?

Ash: no duh.

Misty laughed for what seemed for ten minutes.

Misty: anyway Ash you need a new identity because Xemnes will want you back for some odd reason.

Ash: (sigh) yeah I guess

Misty: ok we have to get you a new look cause people will recognize you in those ones, a new had also cause people will recognize you, and……..a purse.

Ash: NOOOOOOOOOO

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DR: heheh oh and for those who don't know I don't hate Ash I dislike him.

Snagon: he hates Ash


	11. guitar

DR: sup here is a new chapter oh and in this chapter ash is a guy till the end of the chapter.

Misty left the room to get a drink of water when she came back Ash was gone.

Misty: huh?

Misty then heard what sounded like an electric guitar outside. When she came out she saw an amazing site Ash was playing the electric guitar like a rock star hitting every note right. She noticed that a sceptile was playing the drums and pikachu was strangely playing a small base guitar.

Ash:_ She's cold and she's cruel but she knows what she's doing. knows just what to say so my whole day is ruined.' Cause she's bitter sweet she knocks me off my feet and I can't understand why._

Ash started humming the rest of the song while still playing his guitar. He ended it with a awesome finale flames and everything.

Misty: damn Ash I didn't know you could play the guitar so well.

Ash looked worried really bad even Misty was concerned. Misty then realized who he was singing about.

Misty: (blushing) um ash…….can I talk to you inside……

Ash: sure thing Mist-ahhhhh

Ash looked like he was in immense pain then he was a girl again but knocked unconscious.


	12. a purse?

Dracoluck: hi I'm Dragonsrulllz's little sister Dragonsrulllz is looking for Darky his umbreon so I'm in charge of this fic. (yay)

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Ash woke up feeling dizzy his ears were pounding a lot.

Ash: kessa y pnayg ( gimme a break)

Misty: ah you're awake.

Ash: what happened yesterday?

Misty: you pulled out this weird guitar and played it like a pro and you sang a song I really liked it.

Ash: _Shit she saw my guitar wait why do I feel like there is something on my arm?_

Ash looked down and saw the most horrifying sight he could ever see he was holding a …..purse.

Ash: Fryd dra vilg ys E rumtehk y binca vun? (What the fuck am I holding a purse for?)

Misty: oh I went shopping so I thought I'd get the things for your new look.


	13. Cheer up

Dracoluck: ……

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(P.S. ash looks like the girl from firered version)

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Ash: great….

Misty: cheer up Ash you look great.

Ash: ……….

Pikachu: pik pika (it's true)

Ash: …….shut up pikachu.

Pikachu: pi (no)

Ash looked up at the ceiling and sighed he knew he would never be the same.

Misty: Ash cheer up or I'll bring out the mallet.

Ash: fuck your mallet

Misty: (goes into "must kill mode") ASH KETCHUM YOU BASTARD.


	14. christmas tree

When Ash awoke he saw something very unexpected there in the corner of the living room was a Christmas tree presents under.

Ash: huh? What the heck?

(Misty walks in)

Misty: Huh? What the hell?

Ash: I have no idea how this happened but…

Misty: but?

Ash:…I fell like singing my heart out but I can't cause there is someone here besides us.

Misty: who?

Ash:(mumble)

Misty: WHO?!!!!

Ash: Brock

Misty: ah him

Ash: yeah

Misty: Come on out Brock we know you're here.

Brock: hello misty…and who is this vision of loveliness?

Ash: come within a yard of me and I'll kill you.


End file.
